Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Aren't We All Somewhere On The Spectrum?

I was a "difficult" kid.  When I got frustrated I used to run head-first into the refrigerator.  My mom tells a famous story about asking my pediatrician about this behavior.  His sage advice? "The next time he runs into the refrigerator, make his butt hurt worse than his head."

My parents frequently had to load me into the car as a child and drive me around until the early morning hours to get me to sleep.

I remember frequently crawling into bed with my parents and twirling their hair with my fingers all night.  Some mornings my mom had to actually cut my fingers out of her hair because the knots were so tight.

I also remember loving to sit on the curb and count the cars that zoomed by our apartment complex.

I bite at the cuticles around my fingernails and, no matter how badly I try to stop, I find myself subconsciously doing it any time I get an idle second.

I used to collect GI Joe figurines and spent hours in my own little world setting them up in my room.  

Today they call these behaviors  "Stimming." 

I am a classic introvert.  Social interactions literally exhaust me.

I've learned to fake it... to "turn on the charm," but I literally hate being social.

"Small talk" actually makes me angry.    

I am a much better communicator using my writing than I am using spoken words.  I've mentioned repeatedly that my wife often hears my thoughts and feelings for the first time in my blog posts.  

I have few close friends and, honestly, I really don't understand what the big deal is.

I love my wife and family with all my heart, but at least 4 times per day, I just NEED to be alone.

I get severely overstimulated in shopping malls and my wife has labeled my condition as "shopping fatigue."  She gets one hour out of me at a time... tops.

I am an excellent dog trainer and I've found that I much prefer the company of dogs than humans, mostly because of the pure simplicity in communicating with a dog.   

Could I be...

Could you be...

Aren't we all somewhere on the Spectrum?
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7 comments:

  1. SarahApril 10, 2012 at 7:25 PM

    Absolutely!! I chew relentlessly on my poor shirts without knowing I am doing it. My little man who is on the spectrum is usually the one to bring it to my attention. Funny what he brings out in me!

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  2. The Gift of AutismApril 10, 2012 at 7:46 PM

    That sounds just like me as a kid! Except for the part about the fridge and the hair twirling. My coats and coat strings were always soggy. I loved to sort and re-sort my baseball cards. I hate slow shopping - when I go to a store, I like to get what I came for and get out. I'd rather be by myself for downtime. Holidays really stress me out.

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  3. Jen @ BigBinderApril 13, 2012 at 8:19 PM

    Yup. I know how to hang out with people, and I enjoy it for a while, but I always need to be alone for a while after; I chewed my nails, hair, and pencils - I definitely land on that spectrum somewhere!

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  4. BoosMomMay 17, 2012 at 11:18 AM

    Wow. You are so right! I wrote something similar from my perspective recently too. http://pdd-nos-life.blogspot.com/2012/04/me-times-one-thousand.html

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  5. AnonymousMay 20, 2012 at 12:14 PM

    understood. i dont go anywhere without my SD. i cant handle sittngon a bench or shopping, any of the normal things other people do, i hate it. if it werent fo rmy SD, i would be holed up under a bridge:)I also have one son who was deeemd mildy retarded. I yanked him from school and he is now an AF pilot. My second_well lets just say we i am at war with the public school system. Tourettes, Asp, etc. I long for the day when i can simply move into my van and go back to the sea. That day is coming and my son will be coming with me_or he will remain here with "linkages" and an attorney. But my Service Dog is what allows me to "fake it" in public. Finally.

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  6. AnonymousNovember 9, 2014 at 1:45 AM

    You have described me as a kid. I even did the hair twirling.

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  7. c0smic1November 9, 2014 at 11:09 AM

    Back then it was ADHD because autism was more rare. Many fell through the cracks and were pushed and shoved and bullied through school because they did not have a name for the issues the child had. No one understood why the child did not have a filter or would do repetitive things that bordered on ritual like behavior. The constant refrain from the parents was "Why do you do these things? What is wrong with you?" It is painful to go out anywhere and the mind splinters into a million different directions. Yes, the child is aware they are different and has a cast iron shield they have put up to deflect the curious because really what is the point now? However, it does give them great empathy with the two they live with now that are on the spectrum so much so that the therapists have all commented on it.

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